So yesterday was International Coming Out Day. It's a great day to think about how lucky we are here in Canada to be able to come out without facing being thrown in prison. But we still have a long way to go. Today is the anniversary of Matthew Shepard's murder. For those of you who don't know the story of Matthew Shepard, he was a young man who was tortured to death by his peers for being gay. This happened 14 years ago. His murder was a stepping stone in hate crime laws in the U.S. In 2009, after an eleven-year struggle to have violence against LGBTTQ* people recognized as a hate crime, President Obama signed it into law--known as the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act.
I first heard the story of Matthew Shepard when I was in grade 11. My teacher played us the CBC radio coverage of it. At the time I was pretty far in the closet. The gruesome details of his death hit me very hard and if anything pushed me further into the closet. I was so afraid that if I came out something similar would happen to me. I was positive that at the very least I would be kicked out of my home, and lose most of my friends and my family and most of my friends were very Christian and I had many discussions with them about gay rights. Most of them believed that homosexuals shouldn't be granted the right to marry or adopt children. I look back on that now, and while I think my fear was reasonable, it was perhaps unneeded. I came out after going to University and having put some space between me and my family and my friends. My family was very accepting, and I only had a few friends who chose to no longer be a part of my life. And it still pains me that those people left me, as I was very close to them. It hurts to know that they could have cared for me through so many of my issues like depression and self-harm, that they stood by me and promised to always be there for me, but as soon as they found out I liked women as well as men, they abandoned me. I still feel the loss of these friends, but since then, I've made friends who accept me as I am, and kept close with the friends who said who I love made no difference to them. I can't express in words how grateful I am to have such wonderful people in my life who are a fantastic support network for me. Being involved in a lot of public LGBTTQ* rights, I'm still a little frightened that being so open and public leaves me vulnerable to be physically attacked. I have been verbally attacked about being openly bisexual, and yes, words hurt and bullying is a huge issue. But I've developed a pretty thick skin thanks to high school, and it takes a bit of the sting away. I know I'm not the only one with this fear, and I hope that by the time the next generation comes around--hopefully before that--that fear is completely unnecessary. I hope there will no longer be a need for gay rights movement, because we will be have equal rights and be treated with equality. I hope that coming out will no longer be a big deal. That when a teenager goes on their first date, there won't be the assumption that it's with a person of the opposite sex. That when a person wants to go through transition, they will have the necessary resources and support to do so.
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T-Girl
The one with estrogen. Bisexual, student, poet. Intrigued? Well good thing there's an entire blog for you to read then. Archives
May 2014
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